Going into a new setting or environment is often unnerving.

So there are 5 things to tell yourself before going on a job interview, date or to a party.  It’s important to have your mind in check when you go in so when you leave that event it’s with your ideal outcome.

Now before you say “Easier said than done,” we’ve got five affirmations to arm you with so when you walk into a first date or job interview you’re sure to ace it and leave them wanting more.

Before heading into any potentially stressful situation, tell yourself these 5 things:

1. “I got this.”

You can handle this. You may think you can’t but you can.  It may be hard, it may be uncomfortable but it wouldn’t be happening if you couldn’t handle it. You have the skills, you have the connections, you have the confidence to not only make this work, you are in complete control of the outcome of this night, this date or this interview. Even if something comes up that you didn’t expect you are in control of your reaction to it. Someone says something inappropriate that makes you uncomfortable? You decide your reaction, spill your drink?  You get to decide how you’ll react to this accident – laugh, cry, run out of the room or brush it off.  No one can take anything away from you unless you are willing to give it away.

2. “We’re all in this together.”

If walking into a room full of people makes you uncomfortable you’re not the only one who feels this way.  Don’t love public speaking?  Here’s a shocker: not a lot of people do.  Whatever you are feeling right now in this setting someone else is feeling it at the same time or has felt it at some point too.  True, you are a unique person, but this feeling that you are experiencing is not unique.  Being honest about how you feel and owning how you feel is the best way to cope with that feeling.  If you verbalise that feeling to someone else and that someone else is OK with admitting their own insecurities and self doubt then you’ve just become very real and human and with the right person, could have just connected with them in a very real way.

3. “I am totally prepared for this… and anything else that comes my way.”

Even if it’s not 100 percent true, tell yourself that you are prepared for this moment. Something about preparation feels very safe and comfortable.  While a feeling of being unprepared can be scary and uncomfortable, by telling yourself that you are prepared, you will believe it, and in return you will react appropriately. When something comes up that you didn’t expect you can find comfort in knowing that the unexpected was expected and you take some of the fear away by predicting it was going to happen.  For instance, if you were getting married today, and planned everything down to a T; you simply must know that something is going to happen that you didn’t plan. That’s human nature. Because although you’ve planned everything from the flowers to the dress, to your hair, you can’t predict other people’s behaviours, the weather, traffic conditions or spur of the moment events or occurrences.  Accept that and plan the best you can but know, nothing in life is 100 percent predictable.

4. “I look great.”

We all know that looks aren’t everything, but there is something to be said about knowing you look good.  Taking the time to prepare your appearance, whether that be washing and pressing out your clothes to eating healthy and getting in shape, feeling great on the outside will connect with feeling good on the inside.  The self-confidence gained from just saying the phrase “I look great,” can be enough of a boost to get you through the front door and start making some great connections and your personality can take over.

5. “I know what I am talking about.”

Before a job interview the key to your success is preparation.  Prepare your resume and do your research on the company, know their competitors, get your clothes together. Know your own personal history, such as the dates you worked at your last job, what year did you graduate and have a list of references ready to rock.  But there’s something more to knowing what you’re talking about. Say what you have to say with confidence. When you exude confidence, you are establishing a sense of expertise with the person who is interviewing you. You know that phrase, “Fake it until you make it”? This is where this comes in even when you’re on a date with someone new and you act unsure, you’re not going to win any points on reliability. You might even seem shady, untrustworthy or suspicious.  If you’re going to be wrong then be wrong confidently. If you’re feeling shy or uncomfortable, instead of trying to hide it and appear quiet or aloof, often the best bet is to just admit it.  You can win points for being truthful and it buys you some time so that a person won’t be so quick to judge; after all you just admitted something personal, establishing a personal connection and building rapport.

by Shannyn

SHANNYN STEVENS

WORKING MUM

Is a vivacious woman, driven by her love for her family. She strives to create a life with work/life balance and knows what it is like to raise a family and want a career for herself.

 

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